Be a thermostat- set the tone of your dating life

In this, that, & the other    February 1, 2022     0 Comments

A weather thermometer tells you the current temperature of the air. States a fact and that’s it. A thermostat does the same, except it also allows you to set the ideal temperature and then kicks on the a/c or heat. It gives you control.

Which one are you in your dating life? Do you just state the facts (no boyfriend, haven’t met anyone, got ghosted, feeling hopeless) or do you acknowledge the facts and then see where you have control over how to respond?

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Book Post 3: The dating book you wish you weren’t reading (an introduction of sorts)

In this, that, & the other    October 12, 2021     4 Comments

Welcome! I’m blogging my way through what will eventually be a book about dating. You can find all of the book posts here. Below is what will most likely be the book’s introduction, though there may be changes by the time it’s in book form. I know that many authors write the introduction after they’ve finished writing the rest of the book, so we’ll see! I have some initial thoughts before I jump into the main content, so here we go…

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The one lacking a good title and conclusion. But it’s something.

In daily thoughts, dating & marriage    July 23, 2021     2 Comments

I’ve been having the hardest time writing the last two weeks. I am in a season of life I affectionately call the Doozie Days because most evenings I find myself thinking, “Boy, that was a doozie.” I love it, and I’ll miss it when this season is over. But whoa. Let’s just say there are lots of moving parts and people. My time to write happens in a few minutes here and there, yet when those little pockets do arrive I find I have a lot of mental clutter to wade through before actual writing happens.

“I’m the worst writer ever. Why am I even bothering? This is dumb. Is any of this even helpful? Oh look, time’s up. I need to go…”

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Book Post 2: a title and table of contents!

In dating & marriage    July 5, 2021     0 Comments

My family and I had a great time up at Hume Lake last week. Our kids went to day camp for a few hours each day, which means I had some free time to write while sitting by a beautiful lake. It was dreamy.

One day as we were talking to a friend that lives up there, Trav casually mentioned I’d been writing that morning. My friend turned to me and asked me what I was writing about. Cue the awkward pause and then me stuttering something about trying to write a book. Then he kindly asked what the book was about, and I fumbled my way through another answer. Trav jumped in and explained the book better than I did. Bless him. It made me realize it was time for me to stop being embarrassed about attempting to write a book. And I needed to pick a title and write a pitch so I can talk about the thing with some clarity.

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Book Post 1: Blogging a Book

In dating & marriage    June 17, 2021     2 Comments

Whelp. Over on instagram stories the other day, I shared some dating encouragement about seeking out set ups. It was great! Then at the end, I mentioned I’d be taking instagram off of my phone for a few days so I can focus on blogging and writing my book. And now I want to burn my phone and die a little bit.

Why oh why did I remind people that I might be writing a book?!?

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Just put on a hat and do the thing

In daily thoughts    June 11, 2021     12 Comments

Tap, tap. Is this on? It’s been while, team. Let’s see if I remember how blogs work.

One of the tricky things about getting back into something after a break is that the mental block keeping you from getting back into it grows exponentially as time goes on. The last year has been full, to say the least. We added a new baby to our family (hi Wes!), started homeschooling, and the world has suffered through a pandemic of illness, panic, and tension on a scale I’ve never experienced before. All of which has left me with little time for writing and even less confidence to publicly share any words with anyone. It all makes sense and I’m not beating myself up about it, but I’m also trying to figure out how to push back against the fear and insecurity and find my voice again.

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Proactive Dating During a Pandemic

In dating & marriage    March 30, 2020     1 Comments

It may feel like your dating life is majorly on hold during the Covid-19 pandemic. And you’re right- in many ways it is! Meeting a guy in person and spending time together is so important as you decide if you want to move forward. It’s okay to be bummed about pausing that part of the dating process.

However! You can still be proactive in your dating life in other ways.

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Make a Holiday Dating Plan

In dating & marriage    November 22, 2019     2 Comments

The holidays are almost here! I love me some Thanksgiving- the food, family, thankfulness. The food. =) And don’t even get me started on how much I love Christmas. Music, Advent, Jesus, presents! So many things to love. Oh, I almost forgot Christmas trees! Decorations! Twinkle lights! Love, love, love.

Back when I was single, I enjoyed all those things, but there was also an extra amount of loneliness and sadness for me during the holiday season. Married life brings its own set of complexities to work through during the holidays (more on that another time), but generally speaking I am more content now in November and December than I was before I got married. My singleness felt heavier and harder when Thanksgiving and Christmas rolled around each year.

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